Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Rant: Who Brought You Here ??

I'm not asking how you got here to this blog page, but i'm asking you ' who is the one person who you think is responsible for you being whoever you are right now ? or who is the one person who has influenced you the most ? I'm sure we all can answer that question with either a single name, or at least with two-three names max. And i'm guessing as soon as you read the previous line( if you understood what i was talking about) you had a name in mind. Right ? At least i have a name that'll spring up everytime someone asks me something like this.

So, now i'm going to talk a little bit more about the 'name' in my mind.

I'll be very quick to think up the name, but then if you ask me why i chose him/her over all the other people who i've known till now, i really don't think i'll have a answer ready so soon, infact i might not have an answer at all ever. Now that is not cos' i don't have any real reasons ( infact i can go on for hours about why he/she means so much to me) for feeling that way about him/her, but just that those reasons might not make any sense to you, and i don't really think it would do me any good. Also i don't want you to start judging me ( and him/her) without knowing nothing( i would hate that, and i would hate you for that). And also cos' i don't give a damn about what you think about all this, so why bother telling you ?

Now coming to think of it, i don't think i'll be able to answer this question myself( to me), thats cos' there is no way i can express all my thoughts through words cos' there is no way i can put my emotions on record just like that (even to myself, weird?), i don't have the vocab for that yet. And i guess i'm not just missing the right words, but i really doubt whether i'll be able to do justice to my thoughts by trying to describe them to myself. And even if i manage to describe something, i'll be defining boundaries for my thoughts, and i don't want to do that. Also what the heck ? I'm better off not thinking about all that. Right ?

Now, what if i tell him/her about all this, how will she(hint.. hint..) react ?

Well honestly i don't know, but then i'll not be surprised if she is surprised about the whole thing. And again i'll have a very tough time trying to explain my reasons to him/her. Thats cos' of the all the above mentioned reasons put together, and also cos' i don't want to scare him/her off (it could happen).

So, in the end i'm just happy with knowing the name inside my mind.

This is a rant of the best(worst?) kind. No one understands nothing ( including me ?). But i wanted to say something, so here i am. Now, again i think i need to prep a disclaimer for all these posts( i can see many more coming). Anyways here it is - Pls don't take my words seriously and argue with me. Just a ' You Suck' will do if you don't like it( of course i'll have to delete your comment then), and probably you'll be better off if you don't read this ( now, shouldn't i place this at the start of the post ?. But, i bet you would have read this post even then, so what the heck ?).

So i'm just happy i have someone who i can say has really influenced me (why am i happy ? I don't really know ). So even you could take this time off to think bout' that one person in your life. ( spend a few mins thinking about him/her, and then get back to whatever you were doing ).

End of my rant.

Update: Got my unlimited internet connection today.. yay!! ( i started writing this post cos' i wanted to talk about my net connection, but then ended up writing this). So i guess from now on there will be no Bandwidth screwups for me.

Also after reading the above post, if you think i suck at relationship related talk you should check out this post. (Actually i suck at this.. But, then so do you, and so does everyone else in this world.)

( i promise i'll bear with one absolutely crap post in your blog if you keep quiet for this one, i just don't want to let this post rot in my drafts folder )

Cheers..

14 ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS:

Arun Sundar said...

I know it is a "she".

Guru said...

@Arun: If it were not a 'she' i would have been called gay.( not that being gay is anything bad, but just that i'm NOT gay, so..)

Arun Sundar said...

Appuram edhukku avlo "he/she"? Just "she" would have sufficed.

Guru said...

That post was from the other side of ME. The not very bright side.. So, Can't really give explain the reasons right now.. You just have to endure all this..

Random info: She is superawesome !!

Arun Sundar said...

Sendru Vaa maganey!
Vendru Vaa!

Go get her.

vijay said...

Machan aaatha sathiyamma mudiyala da....enda ippadi???

ela said...

enna 2008 love story ya.....after reading and trying to understand ur post...i agreed that in addition to all those stuff love has been said to be, it is also confusing, not so logical and jumbled and has way tooo much of he/she involved......

Just kidding....mudichavanga, time irukiravanga, luck irukiravanga....pannungappa...

ela said...

Arun....ippadi thaan chinna pasangalukku padikira vayasilae advice panratha?

Arun Sundar said...

Yaan petra Inbam peruga Ivv-Vaiyyagam!

And btw, is this not advice too? - "mudichavanga, time irukiravanga, luck irukiravanga....pannungappa..."

Guru said...

@Arun: Love story illa ithu.. So no question of winning 'her'.

@Ela: This is not a 2008 love story, but a memory bout' this friend(true) from 2004. And i'm glad you got my point (about the confusing thingy, i made my post confusing intentionally ;-)).

BTW, you sure it is not mudinchavanga? cos' mudichavanga isn't all that perfect for advice ?

ela said...

Arun...atleast i did not think of it as an advice when i typed it down...it was my own philosophical ranting, i guess...

Guru...i think that's becoz not everyone can come under the `mudichavanga´ category when it comes to love...even after quite a lot of hard work and determination and dedication love can evade people.....and definitely this does not have anything to do with the phyisical appearance, status and bla bla...

But don't let this piece of negative thinking deter you...

Guru said...

Hey ela,

I wasn't being negative at all, infact that angle never occurred to me till you brought it up.

Now when i said it had to be 'mudinchavanga' not 'mudichavanga' i had a very crude meaning in mind(sorry).

I equated mudichavanga to ' everything done' .. meaning someone who's enjoyed all pleasures of a relationship.

And i sure agree with you on this, some people are just not destined for love. Either they remain single no matter how much effort is put in into having a relationship. I've seen quite a few people like this in my (not so) short life, people always ready to get into a relationship, and get snubbed in the end, only to get back in the race very soon.

BTW i've always wanted to ask you this, Ela, why don't you have a blog ? Cos' i want to hear you rant on topics of your choice, rather than random topics that you come across on other blogs.

ela said...

I once had my own blog but later on dissolved it...did not have enough time and also my research work did not go very well...so lots of stress and had to devote all my time and energy to it.... As u would have experienced, even though it is fun maintaining a blog demands quite a lot of energy...it is like grooming one's own self and also all the possible new friendships u make in the process...

And i also like to read a lot.... to know about people and their way of thinking....which gives me new perspectives about things....so what's better than to cruise around....and i have really come across quite a lot of interesting people and thoughts....It makes me happy that i am allowed to enter other's lives and share something...which hopefully also makes them feel good....

May be once when i am finished with this stressful phase of my life, i will start my own blog...

Guru said...

I think even i will be better off doing what you do, just read around, share your thoughts.. But, then writing is pretty addictive, so don't think i'll be happy without a blog of my own.

And i would love to see the day when you start blogging again, you sure will have lot of activity on your blog, with all the effort that you take to participate in discussions on so many other blogs.

Cheers .. Rock on !!

 
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